Chemo and Radiation Update

Sunday, December 18, 2011

I started radiation treatments on Thursday and chemo the night before. So far all is going OK. I have a "hint" of nausea in the night about the time I need to take a sleeping pill to get through the night. I take the pill and I'm off to dream land again.

I did feel a little tired yesterday, but I also got up at 4:00 a.m., so that was probably a factor. I had an hour nap after lunch and made it until bedtime just fine. Hopefully things will continue to go great like this, but who knows.

I was talking with Carolyn Fiorillo's daughter, Melanie, yesterday about Dr. Burzynski's clinic in Houston, TX. She is sold on it and sent me links to his movie again. I did take the time to see it and I am impressed. I think I will look into the possibility of treatment there as soon as the radiation and chemo are over. Perhaps it will be worth the expense. I just need to be careful.

Certainly his "cure rate" mentioned in the movie exceeds the chemo and radiation rates of others. I think it has potential.

The man is getting old and hopefully he has a system in place that is impeccable. It would be great for his system to actually "beat the system." I certainly appears to have the hallmarks to accomplish that.

I will also be talking with my Naturopathic doctor on Wednesday and ask her what she knows about Burzynski. Surely she knows something, so it will be interesting to see what she has to say.

In the meantime, for those wishing to see the movie, you can access it at the following address:

http://www.forbiddenknowledgetv.com/videos/cancer/burzynski-cancer-is-serious-businessfull-length-documentary.html

Copy and paste the above into you browser and it should take you to the movie. There is also a version available on Netflix.

by grace,
Wade

Chemo Began Last Night - Radiation Begins Today

Thursday - December 15, 2011

Well, the Radiation/Chemo journey has begun. I survived last night's bout fairly well. I woke up around 1:00 a.m. feeling slightly nauseous and just lay there awhile. It was too early to take the 1/2 have of a sleeping pill and I was reluctant to get up and take a full one. I lay there for 1/2 hour before finally getting up to take the 1/2 of a pill. It worked pretty fast and I was asleep in not time, but then woke up again at 4:00 a.m. and stayed awake until I got up at 5:00 a.m. The good news is that the chemo affects seem to have been fairly moderate. I do have a slight headache now, which is unusual for me. I hope it is a temporary thing.

Today we will see what effect the Radiation treatment has. My appointment is at 11:00 a.m. and from there we will set up a regular treatment schedule for the next six weeks. It won't finish until the end of January (around the 24th). After that it will be chemo only for six months with one week on and three weeks off. Apparently that will be for as long as is needed.

So far, I need to continue to count my blessings. All is going well. Exercise is making me feel better and stronger. My diet has not become tiresome and I continue to follow it religiously. The only variant that I worry some about is the consumption of alcohol. I have a beer when we go out to Mexican food and sometimes a small glass of red wine at home if I have not had another drink. I do not think I am overdoing it, but who knows.

For now, I guess I worry most about the hair loss from the Radiation treatments! :=)

by grace,

Wade

Another Good Doc - Cynthia Bye - Naturopath

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Yesterday we went to a doctor recommended by Nathan as a result of discussing my case with his chiropractor. Her name is Cynthia Bye and she specializes in working with Cancer patients and with their Oncologists and other doctors. She was exceptional in my opinion.

From the beginning, the first day I called her, I could tell that she knew what she was talking about. One of the main areas is "digestion" verses "what we eat". We are what we "digest" and not "what we eat". In my case, I knew that intuitively to be the case and I was intrigued to see what she said about the matter. One of my chief concerns has been constipation - over a lot of years - and to find a person that could understand that and make appropriate suggestions for remedying the situation makes a lot of sense to me. I have heard, too often, "stool softeners", "fiber", etc., etc., but nothing has worked. Give me something that works!

Dr. Bye's prescription seems to be in good stead and her understandings were well explained by her. She both understood "anti-nausea" and "constipation" as serious issues to remedy first and then to get started on other stuff once those things are dealt with. She was impressed that the radiation is IMRT, a very specialized form of radiation, and that the side affects should be minimal. There are other specialized treatments, but none seem to necessarily be better.

She also was concerned about the side affects of nausea and her suggestions for "anti-nausea" medications sound good too. One of the problems, not "anti-nausea", is sleeplessness. I explained that I use Melatonin and she like that a lot. She prescribed four times the Melatonin that I have been taking, so I took it last night and it did help. I slept fine until midnight and then had to take a sleeping pill. I managed to get through the night and I feel fine today.

I am quite pleased with the prescriptions she has prescribed for me. I am hoping they work fine.

I am also quite satisfied with the "hope" of success for this program. One of the good things I am doing, confirmed by her, is walking and getting exercise. This should also help a lot. I have a feeling that things will continue to go well and that is a good feeling.

"My times are in God's hands."

by grace,

Wade

Two Weeks Since Surgery - Getting Stronger!

Dear Brethren and Friends,

Today is now two weeks since I left the hospital after my tumor was "re-sected." I had another MRI of it take today and the original small tumor is still present (but somewhat beaten up by the biopsy), and the larger tumor is mostly gone, but there is a clear outer ring where it does tend to grow. I go to the radiologist today with the latest image and he will develop a plan of attack using radiation on both tumors. Dr. Neuwelt, my Oncologist will direct the chemotherapy and generally be in charge of my case. My radiation doctor's name is Dr. Aaron Hicks. I also have a neurologist in the area, Dr. Lupu, and he will supervise the Kepra dosage that arrests seizures and related issues.

I continue to be thankful for the work of Dr. Samuel Hughes for discovering and identifying the tumor together with his staff!

The next stage of the treatment, in my opinion, begins today with a visit to Dr. Hicks' office to be fitted for a radiation mask and then analysis for treatment. Since radiation is for 5 days a week, I presume that I can begin on next Monday, December 4th and then continue through the second week of January. Radiation is five days a week and can result in hair loss. YEAH! - I always needed a good reason to be totally bald! Chemotherapy, on the other hand, lasts seven days a week and is a pill that is taken at night before bed and hour after taking an "anti-nausea" pill. It is supposed to be a fairly routine pill to take, limited nausea and the expectation is that all will go well. I am crossing my fingers on that one. Once the 6 weeks of treatment are finished, then I will continue with chemotherapy for 6 months and see how things go. It is the expectation of the doctor that it will continue longer than that if it is doing its job because of the nature of my tumor. It grows in "tentacles", not in a "mass", and how to keep it under control will be the issue.

My prognosis given the art of the treatment is for one good year and then maybe a bad year before dying. But, that could also change. I am healthy and doing pretty good over all. 20% of the patients live beyond the 2 years - up to five years. Lots of things can happen in five years, so we will see.

I continue to be thankful for the prayers of my friends and brethren and well wishers everywhere. I am convinced that the arm of the Lord is not shortened in these things and he does listen to the sincere, and honest and righteous prayers of those that have faith in him. I will today begin to do my best to write to all of you now that I have some time and I am getting caught up on my chores.

We had a blessed Thanksgiving Holiday with my family here in Portland. Stephen and Vanessa picked up my father and they all flew in on Wednesday before Thanksgiving. My brother Dewan from Seattle drove down and spent several days with us before driving my father back to his house for an evening. We drove back half way the next day to pick him up. We spent a lot of time with them and at Nathan's home. It was a good weekend of games, watching TV, fellowship and making some music with our guitars.

Today I begin preparation for an "extravaganza" at the main house on Saturday. It is Sr. Kathy Brooks' "Candlelight Dinner." It has gotten quite popular over the years and Tim and Dawn will not be able to attend to coordinate the music this year. So, Sr. Sarah Lightfoot and I are coordinating the music and I think it will work out well. The evening will start with an hour of "horse' d'ouvres", followed by an hour meal and then culminating in a musical program for the holidays to be enjoyed by all. We are expecting about 70 brethren in all to attend.

The blessings of the Lord continue to shower upon us all even as the turmoil in the world continues about us. Some of us are struggling and some of us not so much, but most of us are getting by and rejoicing in the overruling providence of God our Savior. We studied Psalms last night and the scripture of note is

Ps 18:46-50

46 The Lord liveth; and blessed be my rock; and let the God of my salvation be exalted.

47 It is God that avengeth me, and subdueth the people under me.

48 He delivereth me from mine enemies: yea, thou liftest me up above those that rise up against me: thou hast delivered me from the violent man.

49 Therefore will I give thanks unto thee, O Lord, among the heathen, and sing praises unto thy name.

50 Great deliverance giveth he to his king; and sheweth mercy to his anointed, to David, and to his seed for evermore.

Day Seven Since Surgery

Dearest Friends,

Today is Day Seven since my surgery. I am doing quite well. Thank you to all who have prayed for me and remember me in your thoughts and prayers.

I went to church yesterday and it is was a very good meeting. We had a study in the Book of Romans, Chapter 8 and then a second meeting two of our brethren, Nathan Austin and Tim Lightfoot each gave a short discourse on a topic of their choosing.

Tim's was on the awesome authority of God over all of our lives. He reminded us that we once thought there was nothing faster than light, and yet now they have concluded that "neutrinos" are faster and who knows what the future will hold. Yet, God is outside of all of this. He created it all. Let us allow him the authority and give him the faith that all is in his hands.

Nathan gave a short discourse on "Encouraging The Brethren". It was quite well done also. He brought out many excellent points based on his experiences as a teacher and as a trainer for Casio that proved many good points. One of the thoughts that sticks with me is that we "take ourselves too seriously" when we exert pressure on others to believe as we do. I am hoping to more and more be graceful and to accept with patience the providence of the Lord in all things.

Many of the brethren were surprised to see me and to see me looking well. I did feel fairly good, but perhaps a little tired. The stitches in my head are moderate to see, being made of self-absorbing stitchery. So, I do look almost normal, and, except for being a little tired, I feel quite well. It was good to be out and about with all.

God has planned for a day of restoration of all things which he has proclaimed in his word for all to see and know. We have different ideas about that day, perhaps, but I for one believe it will be a day of blessing for every human being who has ever lived upon the face of the earth. I can think of no better description than the following:

Studies in the Scriptures, Volume 1:191

"Close your eyes for a moment to the scenes of misery and woe, degradation and sorrow that yet prevail on account of sin, and picture before your mental vision the glory of the perfect earth. Not a stain of sin mars the harmony and peace of a perfect society; not a bitter thought, not an unkind look or word; love, welling up from every heart, meets a kindred response in every other heart, and benevolence marks every act. There sickness shall be no more; not an ache nor a pain, nor any evidence of decay--not even the fear of such things. Think of all the pictures of comparative health and beauty of human form and feature that you have ever seen, and know that perfect humanity will be of still surpassing loveliness. The inward purity and mental and moral perfection will stamp and glorify every radiant countenance. Such will earth's society be; and weeping bereaved ones will have their tears all wiped away, when thus they realize the resurrection work complete. Rev. 21:4"

Hallelujah, What A Savior!

Post Surgery News

Hello Dear Friends,

Today is day three since my surgery to remove the tumor on the left side of my brain. It was a success as far as I can tell. I have no memory loss that I know of (hehe) and all seems to be working out well. The recovery was relatively fast and I am now home and feeling fairly well.

The tumor was described in an earlier post and it was totally removed - at least as much as they could see. There was a smaller tumor that does not seem to have grown and it was in a more precarious area, so they left it alone for radiation treatment. I will now have 6 weeks of radiation treatment accompanied by Temador chemotherapy. That will be followed by 1 week of radiation and chemo and then a 3 week rest for 6 months.

I am feeling quite well. I feel stronger each day. I slept a little better last night. I didn't get up until 5 a.m. - my usual time to arise and I'll try to make it through the day today and every day and enjoy each day as it comes. There is so much to see and do and I have so much to be thankful for.

Now that the tumor is removed and Thanksgiving is almost upon us I am looking forward to a visit from my family over Thanksgiving weekend. My father and son Stephen and his wife are flying in from California. My brother Dewan and his wife Linda are driving down from Seattle and we will all meet at my son Nathan's home in Washougal, WA for the day and more. It should be a nice gathering. We will have to wait for another time to see Jay and his family and Josh and his family.

After that it will be time to concentrate on the radiation and the chemotherapy treatments for awhile. Six weeks to be exact. Then it will be followed by a week of chemo/radiation and then three weeks off.

I am looking forward to a lot of fellowship with the brethren here locally. It is time to slow down and to concentrate on studying God's word and applying it to my life. It is time to learn how to apply it to special situations like now. I need to know what to pray for and what to not pray for. I don't want to go against God's will. But I don't want to under capitalize it either. I do believe in the power of prayer and why God will choose to exercise a choice he has give to us all - "free will."

I want to look into other opportunities to serve the brethren here in the USA as I have opportunity. I am suspect of traveling now. We will have to see what the future brings. I also want to enjoy the works of God's creation and leave things well set up for Lois. It is funny how a couple of days leaves one with new hopes and dreams and a feeling of new possibilities. The reality of a resurgence of the cancer is an ever threatening incentive to keep busy and to to capitalize on the opportunities that God has given us each day.

I am so thankful for the prayers of the brethren and for the prayers of my friends over the years. They have all been well received and I am recovering well - or so it seems to me.

I now want to do some research on diet and reach out to the knowledge of clinicians and technophobes in this area. They all "know" more than they "know." Nevertheless, I'll do my best to ferret it all out. I do believe in the philosophy of "alkali or die". So I will start with that trend.

It seems relatively easy to do and some sacrifice on my part will surely help.

Better close this for now and get to work on the basics.

God bless you all.

by grace,

Wade

Ps 37:4-5

Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.

New Operation Scheduled

Yesterday we met with the surgeon, Dr. Johnny Delashaw, to discuss the removal of the tumor and the possibility of it helping with my situation. The appointment was for 9:45 am and we finished it around 11:00 am before going over to see the OMSI exhibit on the human body and the brain.

Dr. Delashaw is of the firm conviction that we should remove the tumorous tissue and then proceed with radiation and chemotherapy. This is the standard of care currently for this disease which is incurable at this point. It may give me a few more months or a few more years.

The surgery was scheduled for Tuesday, November 15th. I am to be at the surgery at OHSU at 6:00 am and we will proceed from there. The first item on the agenda is to get a new MRI that will be used during surgery to remove the tumor. Dr. Delashaw is confident that he can remove at least part, if not all, of the tumor. We have no idea where it has spread and what else is going on.

The surgery has its own risks, but they are minimal compared to the potential pay off of the surgery. It is close to the mid section of the brain, which means that is is likely to cross over to the right side of the brain and it will start to cause "all kinds of problems" according to Dr. Delashaw. It is scheduled to be finished on Tuesday with 2-3 nights in the hospital for recovery before being released to come home. He will cut over or near the old scar, so I am not looking forward to recovery from that cut again. Oh well!

The schedule after surgery remains to be seen. It will be partly determined by how quickly that I heal. If I heal fast then I can hopefully proceed with radiation and chemotherapy quickly. That is my hope anyway. I would like to finish the 6 weeks of treatment by the first week of the New Year. It is only 3 weeks until the business meeting from this coming Sunday. I think Brent should plan on leading that meeting. I don't feel like I will be up to doing it quite yet.

That is all for now. I hope I have answered the questions of my followers, but if not, please write to me or call me at your convenience.

God bless you all.

by grace,

Wade

Oh, What a week will do!

Dear Friends,

Let me say, that Wednesday of last week, I had no idea what would transpire in the week in between. So, let me do my best to describe it.

More in line with the old adage, "it's who you know and not what you know", we were talking with our niece, Debbie Paneta in New Jersey. Debbie had inquired about coming out and being of support when we spoke with my radiologist at Adventist Hospital. Debbie took down a lot of information and consulted with experts on the East Coast about experts out here in Portland. One of them suggested seeing Dr. Johnny Delashaw at OHSU and intervened by sending an email to his office. Consequently, we received, in less than an hour, a call from Dr. Delashaw's office and we were scheduled to go in the same day, Friday, November 4th, for a consultation. We were told that all of the images heretofore taken would be of assistance to him, so we called Adventist and while we prepared to leave for the scheduled appointment at OHSU they made copies of our files that were in the hospital and were in Dr. Samuel Hughes' office. We stopped on the way and picked them up for delivery to Dr. Delashaw. At Dr. Delashaw's office we consulted with him and he stressed the importance of getting a fresh picture, so we arranged for another MRI on Monday, November 7th at 5:45 pm.

On Monday, we went back to the radiology department and got an MRI that evening. We were told that it often takes 24-48 hours to get results, so I really did not expect to hear anything back from Dr. Delashaw until today at the earliest, but he called me yesterday with the results. He did not mince words. He said that he thinks we should go back in and re-sect what is there and then proceed with the radiation and chemotherapy. I asked if the pictures showed other lesions and he said no. At that point he said that he would have his office call to schedule an appointment for this coming Friday. They called today and we have an appointment scheduled for Friday at 9:45 am.

Based on the above information, it is my belief that I will agree to the "re-section" and go back for surgery as soon as is practical. Hopefully it will be within the next week. I do not look forward to recovery from another surgery, but so be it. I will ascertain the risks, but I think the benefits far outweigh the risks. If I can get surgery within the next week, then we can go from there.

I called Adventist today and gave a heads up to Dr. Hicks, my radiologist and to Dr. Hughes my neurosurgeon. I felt encouraged by the response of both.

So, the next step will be a "re-section" to remove the tumor as much as possible. Then will be radiation and chemotherapy to kill as much as what remains as we can hope to kill. I'll try to keep you all up to date as we go forward from this point.

Ps 148:13-14

13 Let them praise the name of the Lord,

for his name alone is exalted;

his splendor is above the earth and the heavens.

14 He has raised up for his people a horn,

the praise of all his saints,

of Israel, the people close to his heart.

Praise the Lord.

The Latest as of November 2, 2011

Dear Ones,

I will try to summarize the current state of things for all who desire to stay abreast of things.

First, I want you to all know that I appreciate your prayers and good thoughts on my behalf. I am doing pretty good. The scar on my head is hard to see now except for how it comes down on the left side of my head. On the whole it looks good. Again, good job doc!

Next, I went to the radiologist at my hospital yesterday and heard what he had to say about the current state of treatment for glioblastoma metaforme. It is a disease that is very very difficult to treat, but the current treatment has relatively good results using radiation and chemotherapy. The radiation will be done at the hospital, about 15 minutes from home, and the chemo will be directed by an oncologist at OHSU (Oregon Health Sciences University). The radiation treatments are as targeted as they can make them with the state of the art equipment available these days. The they will "bombard" the area of the tumor five days a week for six weeks and then a small area out from it. Simultaneous with this I will commence chemotherapy.

After the six weeks are through I will go on a regimen of chemo that includes one week on and three weeks off for six months. Presumably I will be monitored during this time for necessary followup treatment if needed. It might be that additional treatments will be needed.

The nature of the brain, as I'm sure most are aware these days, is that we make memories by sending out new neurons, dendrites and whatever else the brain does to make a memory. The interesting thing about this cancer is that it tries to duplicate itself in the same way. It sends out new pathways and creates new tumors that then have to be treated also.

I have an appointment with the oncologist for two weeks from today that will include a new MRI. He will customize my treatment accordingly.

Ps 24

1 The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it;

2 for he founded it upon the seas and established it upon the waters.

3 Who may ascend the hill of the Lord? Who may stand in his holy place?

4 He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to an idol or swear by what is false.

5 He will receive blessing from the Lord and vindication from God his Savior.

6 Such is the generation of those who seek him, who seek your face, O God of Jacob.

Selah

7 Lift up your heads, O you gates; be lifted up, you ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in.

8 Who is this King of glory? The Lord strong and mighty, the Lord mighty in battle.

9 Lift up your heads, O you gates; lift them up, you ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in.

10 Who is he, this King of glory? The Lord Almighty — he is the King of glory.

NIV

Stitches are out!

Hi all.
Well, today I got the stitches out. Pretty amazing surgeon. There will be very, very, very little scarring. Good job doc!
I asked him to talk to me about "glioblastoma multiforme", so he did. Doesn't sound too promising. Just will do the best I can in the time I have. Thank you God for all you have done. When the time comes, God willing, I'll h ave my family here with me and we'll do the best we can.
So, so funny how you try to prepare for life and then it throws you a curve like this. Lois and I thought we had prepared for the worst. In my case, that means me going first, and yet, not in our wildest dreams did we ever think that likely. Nevertheless, here it is.
Lois will have her Social Security and a LOT of savings. Hopefully we will have planned it OK for her. If all goes well, we will have. If everything goes south, like it sometimes can, then what she will have is what she will have. That is why you have family after all!
As for the cancer, well, it sounds pretty serious. I think health nuts galore can say all they want, but I don't think they can beat this. Not in a million years. Maybe, but I would never bank on it. Folks like the Kennedy's and others that have had the same kinds of experiences would probably agree also. Dying is a part of living, so, that is what we will do when the time comes for us to do it.
I know this sounds hopeless to some of you. It is not meant to sound that way. It is meant to be practical, realistic, on the ground, routine kind of thinking. It may not sound that way, but in reality, that is what it is. I don't want to hope for more than God is willing to deliver, or wants to deliver.
There is more I should probably be writing about all of this, but I'm OK with it really. Really, I am. I'll be OK until the end and then I'll wake up when the Lord wants us all to be together. Praise his name for that.
For now, let me close with the words of one of the Psalms sent to me recently:

Psalm 61 - NASU

1 Hear my cry, O God;

     Give heed to my prayer. 

2 From the end of the earth I call to You when my heart is faint;

     Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. 

3 For You have been a refuge for me,

    A tower of strength against the enemy. 

4 Let me dwell in Your tent forever;

    Let me take refuge in the shelter of Your wings. Selah. 

5 For You have heard my vows, O God;
    You have given me the inheritance of those who fear Your name. 
6 You will prolong the king's life;

    His years will be as many generations. 

7 He will abide before God forever;

    Appoint lovingkindness and truth that they may preserve him. 

8 So I will sing praise to Your name forever,

    That I may pay my vows day by day.

Today I read about a type of treatment called “gamma knife”. It refers to a kind of treatment available here in the USA and maybe not so restricted. On the other hand it seems to be less routinely available than that. That is why I need to contact OHSU now, today, to see what and when it is available.

The “gamma knife” surgery system seems to be a very, very precise surgical treatment using radiation to cut out the tumor and to leave nothing in its place. It appears to be so precise that it can cut out tumors without harming nearby good cells. This does indeed appear to be a kind of surgery that I might both qualify for and that  might be affordable to me.

There is another kind of treatment, alternative to the above, that is based in Houston, TX. It is available at the Burzynski Clinic there and would appear to be very very acceptable also. It does not rely on surgery to remove the unwanted tumor, but relies on "neoplastid" replacement technology. The technology is best described at the following website: http://www.burzynskiclinic.com/what-are-antineoplastons.html

Both of these kinds of treatment seem viable and NOT in competition with each other. Perhaps they can and should be done in combination with each other. These are the kinds of questions that I need to have answered as best as I can.
Not a lot of news today except for following up on the above two therapies. I will try to do some of this today.

Another Day

I suppose I will get used to writing these posts eventually. About the time I get used to them then something will have changed and it will be time to move on and to start another post.

One of the things I hope I never get used to is to write to each of you readers as a reader and not as a nameless and numberless person out there. I want you to believe that I am writing to you and that I am concerned about what you have to say about me and that I am concerned about what you do not have to say.

As time goes on I am sure that the number of writers out there that read this will diminish and eventually falter. That will be fine. I'm not writing it on their behalf either. I'm writing it for the few of you that will want to hang on and to explore this disease that I have for now. We will explore it up and down and in and out and all around. We will take it inside to see what is happening there and then outside to see what is happening there. We will take it to all of those places and maybe to some we haven't even thought of to explore it there!

How do you take a disease like glioma blastoma and talk about it in all of those cases as relevant and meaningful and important to me here as a daily person writing about it? It has a name. It has an unknown cause. It has multiple scientific facts about it. But perhaps the most common multifacet that it has is that it is generally not understood. It could be starting from nothing. It could be starting from something that was not meant and becoming something that is meant. It could be starting from something that was meant to be and is still not apparent. What is that?

Nevertheless, while one of the posts of this series will have to deal with its own history, or more posts, many of the posts will deal with other things about its history and consequences that I won't have the slightest understanding about. I'll just deal with them as best I can and then pass them along.

That's all for now. Hope you have a good day.
Check back later for more writing in case the spirit moves me.

God bless,
Wade

Day Three Of My Recovery

Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Today is Day 2 of my recovery. Technically it could be Day 3. Who cares. Days don't matter so much at the moment. What matters is getting better.

We took the Toyota Sienna to the dealer today to be serviced. It didn't take long and the driver should be back shortly to take us there. It came to $437.67 cents (or somewhere close in that range). Not bad for once every two years.

Nothing else went on today. We just stayed at home and I took in the time to get better. Hopefully by the end of the week that will be me! Meanwhile, I'll wait to see individuals during the week and to talk with family on the phone. I enjoy talking with family on the phone. It makes things nice.

I don't know what tomorrow will bring. It could be worse. It could be better. Who knows. But one thing I know - I will try to make it better. It is my job to make each day I have left the best it can be. The very best. That is all I have to do. All I can do. So, with that in mind I plan to make it happen.

There is lots to do around here, so I will start here. Then I'll go beyond the grounds here to see what I can do. Little by little it is my job to make things happen as fast as they can because I do not know how long I will have to make them happen.

By the way, the surgeon called today. He told me that the MRI came back and it is "glioblastoma multiforme."
He will keep me posted in the next few weeks about the prognosis and what to do.

God bless everyone. God take care of you all.
by grace,
Wade

One Day Of The Rest Of My Life

Monday, October 16, 2011
Today I begin my blog of my recovery.
My recovery! What does that mean? Total recovery? Partial recovery? No recovery?
We shall see.
My first thought is that I should survive somehow, somewhere, sometime. I don't know why I have that thought, but I just do.
My previous recovery journal was upbeat and clear. No reason for it to be downgraded. No reason for it to be down geared. I hope it takes off just like that. And I hope that it takes off just like the rest.
Well, that's all for now. More tomorrow.
Wade

A New Adventure

Well, I'm calling this a new adventure, but it actually started some months ago and perhaps several years ago. But it is and will be an adventure - a journey into the semi-known, albeit better understood now than in the past, realms of the brain.

The impetus for the journey surely started at least several years ago and perhaps decades ago. Who knows? It started when something started to "grow" somewhere near the left temporal lobe of my brain, or [this is part of the journey - to find out the details of exactly where] possibly near the left temporal lobe but also near the base of the frontal lobe. I am sure I will learn much more about these places as time goes by. In fact, little did I know that "The Education of Wade Austin" would take such a turn when I started this blog. Such is life and a life learner.

Speed forward to a time I do recall and the beginning of recognizing that something was not quite right because I was having instances of memory loss. Lois remembers these episodes far better than I do because I was not always cognizant of the "episodes" at the time they occurred except as she would afterward explain or describe them to me.

Rather than sequence them now (I like writing, but I hate to take time out to get the details in sequence when I'm on a roll!), I'll simply describe several that have happened in the last four months (June 2011 until now - September 27, 2011). One instance was early morning and I had been reading or writing in the den. When I heard Lois up, I came in for another cup of coffee and greeted her with a good morning kiss. I got my coffee, returned to the den, but came back out in five minutes to refresh the coffee and again greeted her with a good morning kiss. She thought that was nice, but let me know I had already done it once a few minutes before (which I did not recall).

On yet another occasion we came home from shopping and there was a message on the phone. I checked the message and put the phone down, but then a few minutes later I said, "I have to check the messages on the phone," and checked it again. When I did the same thing a third time Lois told me that I had just checked it two times, but again, I had no recollection of having done so.

Other experiences, more frequent in recent months, have been the occurrence of déjà vu sensations and/or an aura of a smell that isn't real. The smell is usually somewhat like hot roofing tar and as a result it triggers a memory of smelling the same thing as a boy walking home from school and smelling the same kind of smell. Once, at the beginning of a management team meeting where we live, I suddenly experienced a déjà vu feeling accompanied by a sense of fear and the smell too. I had to excuse myself and did so by leaving the table and explaining the sensation to the group once I returned. This meeting was near the beginning of August.

I had gone to see the doctor after one of the earlier experiences and he had order basic blood tests and took notes. The blood tests came back normal except for slightly elevated cholesterol, so we didn't worry much. Then I had a memory loss experience near the end of August, the weekend of August 26, 27 and 28, when we went camping at a state park near Coos Bay, Oregon. On Saturday morning, the 27th, we went into town with my son Nathan and his in-laws to get some brakes repaired on their car. While there we decided to get some breakfast, but before breakfast Nathan and I started a conversation about computer technology. {I only remember it based on the accounts of others.) Our conversation was interrupted when some of us went to McDonald's for breakfast and some went to a local bakery type of restaurant. When we finished breakfast the car still wasn't ready and Nathan attempted to resume our conversation and my response was "What are you talking about?" That apparently freaked out Nathan and he asked his mother "What's up with dad?" She told him she would explain later, which she apparently did, but I vaguely recall having a conversation and not the details.

When we returned to camp Lois and I had to move our truck camper to a different spot across from where we had spent the night. We lifted the jacks and I moved the truck and camper, but just after doing so I said to Lois, "We have to move the camper." She told me that I had just moved the camper, but I insisted that no, we had to move the camper. She pointed out that we had been in the other spot and recognition set in that we had indeed been there, but I had no recollection of moving the camper. Nor did I remember adjusting one of the tie downs because I asked Lois, "Did you move that tie down?" She had to tell me that I had done it before moving the truck.

There were no more episodes on that trip, but it was an impetus to see the doctor once again. So when we returned I made an appointment after Labor Day to see the doctor. Based on the accounts of what had been happening he decided to order an MRI, so on September 12 I did have an MRI without contrast (a special dye) and the images revealed "something". So, to get a better look, the doctor ordered another MRI, this time with contrast. The results revealed a 9mm something. According to the radiologist it is in the left temporal lobe and would account for the sensations I have been having. My doctor, Dr. Audrey Williams, felt it warranted a referral to a neurosurgeon, and so I made an appointment for today with Dr. Samuel Hughes.

Dr. Hughes wanted to know why I came to see him, even after seeing the MRI images. Lois explained the episodes leading up to today. Then Dr. Hughes explained why a surgeon did not necessarily have to be the next referral and why he, even though a surgeon, would not rush to cut. The spot could be a lot of things. It could be one of a couple kinds of aneurysms or perhaps, more generally, some sort of vascular problem. It could be a tumor. It did not necessarily have to be in the left temporal lobe. It could be in the frontal lobe or in the area between the frontal lobe and the temporal lobe. In any case, it is deep. It could be malignant or benign. It could be totally within the neuro spinal column (NSC) or it could be a tumor from somewhere else in the body - another cancer elsewhere. Therefore, many tests are warranted to rule out cancer elsewhere in the body and a consultation with a neurologist would help to rule out, or in, MS or epilepsy.

Wow! Sounds like a great case!

Wine

Part of my education, this late in life, is to learn what wines I enjoy most as well as learn to discriminate the nuances of wine so that I can describe a wine's flavor and its impact on my palate. Recently I had my first experience at wine tasting while returning from our trip to Alaska. We were almost home, on the Washington side of the Columbia river at Maryhill and proceeding west along Washington State highway #14. We stopped at a small winery, Cascade Cliffs, and indulged in my first ever wine tasting experience at a winery. All I can say is, "It was great." The winery was small enough that the manager (not the owner) described the 5 wines available that day for tasting. I very much enjoyed experiencing varieties I would otherwise not have tried and one in particular caught my fancy, and the price was right, so I bought it.
We also stopped at Maryhill winery and I tried their wine tasting varieties. They were generous in their samples, but I wasn't nearly as impressed with the wines as I was with Cascade Cliffs, yet Maryhill is a larger winery and much more well known.
Tonight for dinner I opened a Chianti from Italy - Gabbiano Chianti Classico 2007 - that I bought on sale at Safeway. Normally 8.99 a bottle, Safeway had a 30% off sale, so I took the opportunity to buy 12 bottles of various varieties. The Chianti is a keeper. It was great with the grass feed beef steak we had for dinner, but I think the "spiciness" of this somewhat dry wine would be awesome with pasta or pizza. I'll look for this wine again!
Isn't education fun!

A Great Quote - A Greater Idea

A true revolution of values will soon cause us to question the fairness and justice of many of our past and present policies. On the one hand, we are called to play the Good Samaritan on life's roadside, but that will be only an initial act. One day we must come to see that the whole Jericho Road must be transformed so that men and women will not be constantly beaten and robbed as they make their journey on life's highway. True compassion is more than flinging a coin to a beggar. It comes to see that an edifice which produces beggars needs restructuring.
–Martin Luther King, Jr., civil rights leader (1929-1968)

For some reason I have not often read the quotes on Michael Josephson's weekly email reminders of his commentaries, but I did today and the above quote was there. I noticed my son giving money to a homeless man the other day. That was good I thought. I fear that the political acrimony in this country is making the Jericho Road worse - not better. It is possible that the tensions here and abroad are not worse than in previous times, but they seem worse to me. Maybe I have just forgotten the 60s - or maybe I was tuned out and oblivious. I just know that lately, as I have tried to understand the national debates on foreign and domestic policies of the USA, I more and more find myself concluding that I either have to get involved or tune out. But if educated minds, the likes of Paul Krugman, Megan McCardle, and Will Short, to name but a few journalists, can't agree about how to make a better road, not to mention [if I give them the benefit of doubt] the well meaning politicians, whatever their ideology, then what could I possibly contribute?

Maybe I'm happier being a "good Samaritan" and not a road changer - not to say that the two are mutually exclusive - but the latter seems hopelessly fruitless.

Another quote on today's email was:
The drops of rain make a hole in the stone not by violence but by oft falling.
–Lucretius, Roman poet, philosopher (c. 99-55 BC)

Maybe the "good Samaritan" acts do more in the long run to make a better road.